It has been a long time since I have done any sort of formal observation of Ostara (the spring equinox). Although I have been cognizant of the date and have recognized the turning of the Wheel, I haven’t done a full-on ritual or any deep spiritual work for the Sabbat in many years.

This year feels different.

This year I am feeling called like I haven’t felt in a long time, and feeling a connection to the energy of the spring and the growing earth like I haven’t felt in years. It’s exciting and a little frightening, because there are a lot of things I walled myself off from long ago that felt like this. This connection. This sense of other. And while there were good reasons for building that wall at the time, there are a lot of things I lost and I miss from having done it.

I don’t remember how I found (or was found by) Khepri, the Egyptian god who represents resurrection, renewal, and the sun. And while the scarab that represents him is ubiquitous in Egyptian mythology, Khepri himself seems to be nowhere near as well known as gods like Asar (Osiris), Aset (Isis), Ra, Heru (Horus), etc. But he has been present in my life for longer than I have been actively aware of it. Maybe it’s only appropriate that I’m feeling this pull towards renewing my spirit and spirituality during the spring equinox this year.

Maybe it’s the gods hitting me upside the head with a clue-by-four and reminding me that the path is always there if I’m willing to take it. ::grin::

Ostara is about rebirth and growth, but also about balance. I want to use this time to rebuild and nourish my spirit, and to find the balance that I remember having.